(29) 90 in 90: Thanksgiving x2

Thanksgiving. A holiday that is as synonymous with America as Christmas and the Fourth of July. Its that time of year we think about the past and the future. We appreciate the people we have and the people we have been lucky to have known while eating copious amounts of food and drinking more than our fair share of wine.

Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays. It was always the time I looked forward to, seeing some family who I rarely ever saw, eating the delicious food that we only saved for once a year and playing games with my family long into the night. Its the one holiday that makes me nostalgic every time I think of it and the one holiday that makes me miss home the most when thinking about it.

Being in a foreign country that does not celebrate the holiday can be difficult times.At one end, you're enjoying your new life and freedom to escape from the confines and restrictions of your own country, its your adventure to the new and exciting and you're living it everyday.

On the other hand, it makes you long for the comfort and familiarity of home. The foods and the people and the places that no mater how hard you try, are impossible to recreate on the other side of the world. It's easy to get caught in this sort of mini depression, missing the things from back home that used to be such a big part of your life.

However, what people do is create their own celebrations, start new traditions. Share the company with people you've met on the other side of the world and enjoy this day together. You're all in this together, away from home and loved ones so its the perfect time to be together. Lonely people becoming un-lonely togehter.

I was lucky enough to participate in two Thanksgiving celebrations. One of them a large church gathering in Daegu and a smaller more intimate on with friends in my town of Gimcheon. Both gave me time to spend with the people I cared about the most in Korea and also gave me an opportunity to have a little taste of home with generous amounts of turkey, stuffing, cranberry sauce and mashed potatoes.

I always look forward to gatherings like these. I don't often have as much time as I would like with people due to my schedule and the randomness of other people's schedules. However, its nice to have holidays together, its a time to appreciate the unique situation were in, living across the world and lets us starve off our homesickness for a little bit.

This is post is really short, I wish I had more to say but, my mind is kind of blank today. I had a great Thanksgiving in Korea. I could not have asked for anything better.

Oh, if there was one thing I was thankful for this year, and every year since working overseas, its not having to wake up at the crack of dawn to go work a part time retail job selling cheap electronics to people who are more than willing to kill one another just to get that TV. One thing I do not miss is working Black Friday. It is my sincere wish to never work or never go out on that day ever again. Crazy is what it is. Just crazy

(25) 90 in 90: Perspectives and Refocusing

I am currently a high school teacher in South Korea. Being a high school teacher is not a end game career for me. I enjoy teaching, in fact there are days when I love teaching, but in the end it is not what I want to do for the rest of of my life.

Knowing this does not alter the way that I teach and what I teach. While I have never been formally trained in education or teaching, I am constantly trying to make efforts to improve my ability and methods. I understand the importance of being an educator and despite the naysayers, I still feel that strong efforts on behalf of the teacher can rub off on the students in a positive way. Show students you care enough, and they'll care right back. Of course this is not always the case but even those who sleep in class will  know that you're a teacher who is trying. (they just choose not to pay attention)

There are days where being a teacher in Korea can be a frustrating experience unlike any other job I have held. The days where your lessons fall on deaf ears. The days where students would rather sleep and talk to their neighbors than pay attention. The days where your co teachers would rather read a book or not even attend the class rather than try to help you. There are days where you'll fight with your school over a contracts or miss communication. While the exact experiences may vary from teacher to teacher, school to school, I'm willing to bet that most teachers have experienced these things before.

However, despite the days where I want to pull my hair out in frustration and moments where I yearn for the comfort of home, I have never stopped caring about my job and the people who are part of my job. Some people have horrible teaching experiences here and leave with bitter feelings and unpleasant memories. I'm happy to report that I have more good memories than bad ones.

Last week I fell into a series of depressing days. I had just gotten over a huge argument with a loved one, was criticized by my school for making an error that was originally their fault to begin with and falling ill with a nasty stomach virus. It was enough to make me fed up with my job and living overseas and made me wish I could return home again. I felt that I was close to my limit, I didn't want to be here anymore and face the frustration.

It was only a few days later that I saw the error in my emotional state and realized that while things were bad, there was no reason to leave, no reason to turn my back on a country that had given me so much. The frustrations of daily life combined with job hunting and was slowly boiling under the surface and just like a volcano on the brink of exploding, the tiniest provocation could set me off.

Unlike my geological analogy, the damage I caused wasn't permanent and instead offered me some perspective. It offered me the time to think about what I wanted, where I was and where I wanted to go.

More than anything else, the time to cool down and reflect has left me thankful, to exam just what a great life and opportunity filled living I currently have. I thought about how everyday was a new adventure and a  new opportunity to learn something new. I thought about how I was making a decent living, paying off a debt that would enslave my life and time if I remained in my home country. I thought about the people I have met and the people I currently have. How they have changed and shaped me for the better and provided me with the opportunity to share my adventure with them.

I am currently a teacher. I will most likely remain a teacher for  a little while longer. I still want to be a journalist. This has not changed. This will most likely not change for awhile.

No matter where I am and what I'm doing, the end goal, no matter how vague and distant it may seem is always something to keep me on track, the let me know I still have somewhere to go.

It lets me know that one day I will have to settle down. It lets me know all of the opportunities I have waiting for me, and that time spent exploring the possibilities and enjoying the little moments is better than moping of the ones you can't have.

Reflection has put me back on track and put my mind in its place again.

There will be more rough days ahead. There will be more bad days, arguments, disagreements and disputes.

There will be rejections and failures. Self doubts and worry.

I will have them in Korea.

Then again, I will have them no matter where I go.

That much is certain, but so is the promise of good days.

Which one do you think is the better to focus on?

Like our good friends Jules and Vincent, sometimes a moment of clarity is what you need to put things back into perspective.

(24) 90 in 90: Friday Night Frights and Days of Future Past

Autumn is here in Korea. The crisp air is a refreshing change from the hot and humid summers.

It's a Friday night in the quiet town of Gimcheon and the first day of November. After spending a week of having plans fall through, job issues, communication issues and a good ole' helping of homesickness, the week and month of October is finally over and are now only two months away until the end of 2013.

Halloween is actually one of my favorite holidays, and the fact that I was unable to properly celebrate it this year left me a little sad. The last time I had a fun celebration with friends was nearly three years ago while I was still attending my university. The following three years were spent studying, working, being sick and being busy through the holiday. I did small celebrations by spending a few hours with friends, and while they were great fun with great people, something has always felt missing.

I tend to get that feeling from time to time. Wanting to celebrate something during a time of importance and always feeling that something is missing. It's not a sense of being disappointing or let down, but rather something tugging at your mind, that nagging sense that while everything seems right, there is something deep down that is off.

Perhaps its my sense of nostalgia, always subconsciously comparing the memories and days of yesterday, creating an expectation of scratching that nostalgic itch that we all yearn to find and hold on to, desperately struggling to hold on to that one time in our past that seemed without worry or regret, the reminder of what our lives once were and perhaps the hopes that the same feelings and memories can be repeated in the future.

Perhaps its homesickness? I do admit that after going home for a week to see friends and family, a small sense homesickness has been creeping up on me from time to time. It's never enough to make me yearn to return to my homeland, but its enough to put memories of good times from the past randomly inserting themselves in my mind. When things go bad or you have a bad week, we tend to think of home and all the good things about it.

Despite being an adult, my sense of security and relief still goes back to home, to my family and friends living their lives without me on the other side and the sometimes wishful feelings that they could be with you, to watch you take the punches life throws at you and be there to wipe away the blood and ice the bruises.

I rarely tend to get like this, I always appreciated the freedom and sense of adventure being away from home brought with it. Sometimes though, home is a comforting thought. Its that blanket of security that comes from knowing that no matter where you are and what you do, you can always go back home to security.

This feeling doesn't come often, but it still manages to creep in from time to time.  It doesn't happen as often as it used to, but the fact that it occasionally does happen proves that no matter where I go and who I'm with, no matter how successful or happy I become, home is always on my mind.

Home will always be on my mind, this is not a bad thing.

                                                 This song always reminds me of home.

Thoughts of home and holiday

I love the holidays, the big holidays. The ones that you see on greeting cards and the ones that have songs played on the radio about them. They may have become more material (or rather more blatantly so) than before, but all the commercial glam and glitz I could care less about. I have in essence always enjoyed Thanksgiving and Christmas because of the two things it brought with it: the copious amount of free time and time spent with my family.

My family was never very large. All of my holidays have always been spent with my immediate family; my mother and father, my siblings and occasionally my grandparents.  When I was young this used to bother me. I would always hear stories about my friends going off to different state to visit their large families packed with uncles, aunts and cousins in some warm and sunny state while my holidays were spent in my own home in the cold and grey Indiana winter. As with all young children with a limited grasp of the world, I always wanted more, I always wanted what I couldn't have.

As I grew older and wiser, I realized that the idea of going to a faraway place to see relatives that I didn't really know or care about didn't appeal to me. It was no secret that my family was separated by distance and personal differences. Why make an effort to be with people who didn't feel the same. As I grew older, I began to appreciate the people who were with me all the time, the people that I actually enjoyed spending time with, I eventually grew to loving the small family and simple holidays that I had. They looked unspectacular to the outsider looking in, but for me their simplicity meant comfort. I could be myself, not have to put on a face to please other people, I could joke around with my siblings, drink more than I probably should and pass out on the couch later on in the evening. It was pure, comfortable bliss.

In a way, I already celebrated Thanksgiving in my own way a few months ago by celebrating Chuseok in Korea. I traveled with friends, had a great meal and overall had a great time. However, the strong sentimentally of the holidays and the end of the year approaching, I have to admit, that the slight feeling of homesickness is beginning to creep over me.

It comes in little unexpected ways. From little emails sent to remind me about Black Friday deals to tweets giving tips on who to stay healthy during the holidays, it’s the little clues that pop up the remind me that while my life in Korea, a new culture has been going along well, almost a new life, different from my old one, life and my family has been continuing without me, taking part in traditions and events that used to be a prevalent part of life still continue, minus one person.

I’m sure I’ll get over it and get back to my own life of working and living in Korea. It’s just funny how the littlest things can often remind us of home and the smallest hint of something can bring back happy memories from your past, making you long for the people and places of yesterday.

They say you can never go back, but as Korea has proven to me time and time again, this is not always the case.

To all back home and to all those around the world, Happy Holidays. Stay safe. Stay happy. Keep those you love in your minds and hearts.

The closest video I could find related to Thanksgiving. I must admit, I will miss the turkey and dressing. Also, Fresh Prince.